A few months ago, my mind ran on a friend that I have not seen in years. When my mind suddenly runs on someone that usually means one of two things: Something has happened and my 'spidey sense' is in full working mode OR, I will run into them at some point soon.
Long story short, I was friends with this girl from my elementary schools days until her family decided to move. She moved with a relative in the neighbouring city, while the rest of the fam moved East. We kept in touch while she lived in the neighbouring city-and she eventually found her way East to be with her family. We still managed to keep in touch with her moving even further. To be fair, she did not drive and made the effort by other means of transportation to visit me in the West.....
To be even more honest, she made tremendous effort to keep our friendship going. I became too pre-occupied with another group of friends, school, work and relationship (which I would learn the hard way that all with the exception of school were a figment of imagination in the worst way..but I'll get to that in another post..promise). I don't know how we managed to get together, but we went clubbing one weekend and I had one of the BEST times of my life! (This was 10 years ago and I can still remember that weekend as if it was yesterday #tunup).
Well, life gets in the way and we pretty much lost touch. The last time I heard anything from her was months before I got married. We both joked that marriage was something we both swore off...and here it is me off all people getting hitched. I'm a strong personality-who-doesn't-take-crap-or-put-up-with-nonsense-especially-from-testosterone ridden-counterpart kind of chick. (Again, another post..double promise).
Almost three years later, I have been looking for my friend. Life has given me blessings and rainstorms at the same time. I have been in reflection mode...I have evaluated those that have come, gone and stuck by my side like a true friend is supposed to. I have come to the conclusion that this girl was indeed a TRUE friend. If I had my eyes open, I would have maintained that friendship.
So, a few months ago I went on a blitz looking for this girl. I tried emailing her, only to have her address bounce back because the account was closed. I then tried reaching out to one of her friends, who I hung out with back in the day (at her request). That went NOWHERE. I then tried contacting her sister through email and my hubby's facebook account-I don't have one and I really don't want one. Again, COLD trail. Tonight, something told me to try again. Lo and behold, I found her on Google+.
I figure she is now, where I was a few years ago (KARMA, peeps). At the end of the day, the girl cannot say that I did not try. If she wants to resume our friendship, I would be more than happy to. However, because I feel defeated in my attempts to reconcile (and I lack patience), I don't really want to reach out to her for fear of rejection at the same time. I really don't need someone thinking I am begging for their friendship, because the truth is I'm not. I miss my friend and I would like for us to be on good terms, because there were no issues to begin with. Yet, it has to be mutual as opposed to one-sided. I don't do one-sided relationships...ANYMORE!
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RECIPE of REFLECTION
- 2 cups of Patience
- 2 cups of Tolerance
- 1 cup of laughter
- 1/2 cup of anger
- 4 cups of Balance
- 10 cups of Fun
- A dash of solitude (you need alone time)
- 1/2 a cup of thought
